The exam is closing in, statistics, accounting, macro, micro whatever, but the book is just so boring, yet you know there are no excuses. Your apartment is cleaner than ever, meals have been prepped, and maybe you’ve even cleaned your windows. 

There is nothing else to do. You’re at the point of no return. 

But wait, you call that relative you haven’t talked to in too long and realize Christmas is coming up. She is the type of person who already has it all, and she’ll tell you all she wants is something you’ve made yourself. It’s an opening, a totally legitimate procrastination project: Welcome to project Lovikavante. 

Step one, head to the wonderful Garn by Hulda. The best yarn and knitting store in all of Lund.

Here you talk to Hulda for a while, get some inspiration, find the right colors, get the yarn, some needles, and a big confidence boost. What can go wrong?

Step two. Apparently everything. You realize quite quickly that you haven’t t knitted a stitch since arts and crafts in middle school. After the first three tries of trying to put stitches on four of the five needles, you find yourself on the brink of giving up. Instead, you head to the cornucopia of knowledge, YouTube. Here you find countless videos with cozy grandmas teaching you everything you need. Finally, you are making progress. Maybe too much. At three am you find yourself not with a glove but a wrist warmer. Well, at least you have something to do tomorrow.

Step three. New day, same options, study, or knit. It’s an easy choice. 

Strengthened with a good podcast you backtrack and this time, you remember to make the thumb! It took six tries to get it right. Procrastination aint easy but someone’s gotta do it. 

This is where it happens, the looming threat of exam day seems impossibly far away, the stress runs off you, you lower your shoulders and you start breathing with your stomach. And to your utter amazement, you soon find the first procrastination-mitten is already done! It might not be perfect but you have made nothing into something and the pride is overwhelming. 

Step four, the coursebook you’ve been using as a coaster for your teacup looks even more threatening now. Can you really study before the second mitten is done? Your creation lies there all lonely, it needs a partner quickly, and you oblige. The second mitten basically knits itself. The hours of trial and error paid off and you’re flying through the project. This time you nail the thumb. 

Some friends propose a beer at Inferno, but you’re busy, blaming the exam you stay at home, one goal in mind. As the light fades you’ve done it; two genuine and traditional Lovikavantar in all their glory. You put down the needles and through what can only be described as a godly intervention, you surprise yourself by opening the book.

Three days and four hours til the exam. It’s cramming time, you’ve been there before and know it’s possible. The basement of Alfa becomes your home, the book becomes your life and the subject invades your dreams. 

Step five, the day arrives, the studying paid off and it feels like it went ok. The beer after the exam tastes just as good as a post-exam beer should.

When you get home your room is upside down. Food boxes everywhere, dirty laundry, and dying plants. Peaking out from under a cushion you see them, seemingly glowing with pure Lovika power. You hug your mittens. You even dance all alone in your room holding them tight to your chest, singing out loud with your very best post-exam voice. 

Best procrastination project ever! 

PS. You can never start your procrastination project too early, so head back to Huldas asap and this time shoot for the stars. An Icelandic sweater maybe?

PPS. This is the knitting instruction I used: https://www.jarbo.se/lar-dig-att-sticka-lovikkavantar-92495