01:47. I wake up to a glaring light and the sound of a notification from my phone. A friend of mine has shared a fashion account on Instagram and she quickly asks what I think about the clothes. Before I reply, I begin thinking that the clothes are really not my style. However, it sure would suit her.
01:50. My head is spinning. I can’t stop thinking about how I would describe my clothing style. What do I usually wear? Suddenly I find it hard to sleep and all I can think of is the enormous range of various clothing styles that exist, but simultaneously how we all sort of dress identical. Disoriented, I go back to Instagram and scroll through my feed. Everyone looks the same. Including me.
08:00. After a few hours of sleep, I wake up to the sound of birds chirping and the sun’s rays slowly but surely finding their way through my windows. As I get out of bed, my eyes wander out the window where I see cars pass and people bicycle. Everyone is on their way somewhere and the spring is in the air.
I open my closet and scan through all the garments. The night’s thoughts about what style I have really etched themselves in my memory. It’s a blissful mix of clothes hanging in a row. It is everything from patterned tops in colorful shades to basic garments in beige, black and white.
Garment after garment goes off the hangers as I try to get an overview of everything I own. I have decided to try a new style of clothing. Maybe I dare to try the clothes that make me look like a businesswoman or the style that makes me look like any Scandinavian influencer.
11:10. My phone goes off and interrupts my thoughts. My friend shared another post on Instagram with me. She tells me that she could see me in the clothes in the picture. It is colorful garments from head to toe. I continue my screen time towards the account of the post, where I am met by all the colors of the rainbow. I think quietly to myself that I wish I would dared to go out in clothes like these. But something is stopping me.
I can not count on my two hands how many times I bought protruding clothes and thought I would have the courage to wear them. But here they are, in my closet, waiting to see the sun’s rays. I’m considering if it’s finally time for them to breathe some fresh air. But still, something is holding me back.
It’s those glances. Up and down. Down and up. I do not understand how a small glance can have such a big impact on me. “Do I look weird in this blouse?“, “Are these jeans too small?” or “Maybe I should wear one of the other outfits that I know look good?“. But why does one glance from a stranger on the other side of the street have to mean that the clothes I wear are not good-looking? How many times haven’t I done the same thing to someone else and thought “I would also like to dress like that“?
The bird’s chirping is heard once more and the sun warms my body through the window. With spring approaching, I feel strong. A kind of courage. I begin to buy a lot of new clothes that make me happy. Clothes in beautiful colors, flattering shapes, and stylish details. There was something about the picture that my friend sent me on Instagram. I decided it’s time for a change. This spring I will try a new style. That style I dreamed of for so long but did not dare to carry because the fear took over. And that applies to everything. I sincerely hope that we all start to think a little more and dare to invest in what we want. If it is to find the courage to pursue a new style of clothing, move to a new city, or start a new job. It is our body and our life, no one else should be allowed to decide over what we want or who we want to be. Why do we care so much about what everyone else will think about us and our decisions? If someone does not like the outfit I am wearing, so what? I like it and that’s all that matters. Everything else is irrelevant.
Therefore, this spring I do not intend to let anyone other than myself choose what to wear. If someone does not like my style or how I dress, it should not affect me negatively. This spring, I intend to shine like the sun and warm my body with clothes in colorful shades from head to toe.
It is admirable with people who dare to do their thing and are not afraid of what others will think and feel. I too want to be the one who simply shrugs a little when I get a glance from across the street.
01:50. I no longer lie in bed and think about what style I have. I think I found a home now. The clothes in my closet make me want to jump out of bed in the morning and I look forward to painting the whole sky in the colors of the rainbow. And you should do it too!